A little after lunch, I bathed my little boy and put him to sleep. He fell asleep while I was cleaning his ears. I was glad I didn't have to sing while I rock him until he surrender to slumber. He's a real heavy boy, and it's just so much work. When my hands were finally free, my mind gathered thoughts on how to spend my time wisely. In an hour or two, my son would be up again and I'm back to being a super mom, so I got to hurry. I wanted to do so much in so little time. And I've already wasted precious minutes on contemplating alone. I had to move real quick.
So I started doing the laundry. Right after I dried my overworked hands, I played the fitness program on tv and began working out. After 30 minutes, I checked on my little boy and decided to take a shower since he's still deeply asleep. Just a few minutes after I put on my fresh clothes, he woke up. And just like that, my free time's over.
I wish I had a handful of time and energy. I want to give all my best efforts to bring up my son, and I also want to be able to nurture my own needs. I guess motherhood has taught me the true worth of time. It is only now that I am starting to realize that instead of spending most of my days getting drunk or cheating on my partner in the past, I should've taken time to relax while reading a good book, or fall asleep after a movie marathon. I should have allotted time for exercise and preparation of healthy meals. Now there's just so much work to do, a lot of changing and catching up.. And very, very limited time.
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